THE DEATH ADDAH: aka The Bike Build

Death Adder?

So, I’ve got an Australian buddy who I met through work too many fucking years ago to admit, that started calling my bike “The Death Adder” (sounds like “death addah”). It started something like this:

“You always ride your death addah to work, mate?”

“Death adder?”

“Yea, your bike, man, even in this shit weathah?”

“Fuck yea, I always ride. It’s Seattle, the weathers the weather. What do you mean death adder, dude? That’s hilarious”

“Yea, well, that’s what me dad always called ’em. He was a cop, right? He said the best way to get proper fucked was to pedal around like an asshole on a bike and get hit by a cah. Death addah. Adds death. Or somethin’, fuck if I know mate. The Death Addah!”

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This POS.

“Work’s for me. The Fuckin Death Addah!”

I’ve had this bike for even longer than I’ve known my buddy. It has been a sturdy and reliable steed. Believe it or not, the first time I trained for the STP I did it on that fucker (with a set of slicks, of course). I mean 50-60 mile rides. It moves better than you’d think.

Clip shoes? Skinny tires? Special seat? Disk brakes? Poly-carbonate fairy-cocoon-silk frame? Get fucked man, this is the death adder.

So what?

So since having a kid, switching jobs, and buying a house in the shifty north end of Seattle colloquially called  Lake City, it had become unfeasible to pedal my fat ass to work everyday. Yea, I could do it, been wanting to honestly, but that ride will eat up AT LEAST 2 hours a day.

So what?

Well, I’m a selfish prick (sic). Since I really, truly, profoundly enjoy spending time with my kid (and wife, but she’s up late), I want to do it as much as possible. I really do. This includes time in the morning and time at night. And, since I am also a very lucky prick (job wise), I can. so I do.

Jesus! So. The. Fuck. What?!?!

OK, so I’m building an electric bike. The WHY being two things.

  1. I really miss riding my bike to work (and sorely need regular exercise)
  2. I need a short commute

I started researching a couple of months ago into the whole thing, and was pretty put off pretty quickly. Top speeds. Range. The sweet-baby-moses prices. None of it very encouraging.

The gig is, I’m looking at a 10-15 mile ride (routes need to be variable) one way, and right now, if I’m fucking on I can average 15 mph sucking water and power bars. Most of what I was seeing topped out at 15mph. Might make me sweat less, but the flat out fact is I need to be faster. And not spend 5k.

Honestly, mine is not a new story, just go to endless sphere and take a gander. Nah, you know what? Bullshit. The death-adder IS a new story. I’ll just be climbing up and over all the blood, sweat, tears, chemical fires, wasted money and sold souls of those before me. Hopefully.

I intend to, I am (the bulk of the parts are here already), going to change The Death Adder over to an electrified bicycle.

This is already happening. Money’s been spent. Fingers have been burnt.